Many first and second year students were left struggling to finish their End of Course Exam when they discovered it was written in Ancient Greek. There were mutterings of hypocrisy rather than Hippocrates as students left Scientia.

One anonymous student could be heard to wail, “But I didn’t go to private school on the North Shore.”

The student later discussed with our reporter that despite hearing the scaling benefits of Classical Greek during the HSC they elected to study 4U Maths, English Advanced, Physics, Chemistry and Economics. “Gotta do the Asian-Five to get into med. I mean I’m not Asian, but, like, I’m not dumb. Common knowledge.”

When asked for a comment MedFac replied that as the Hippocratic Oath was written in Ancient Greek it was only fair students should be able to sit an exam in that language. “We’ve warned students to stop relying on past papers, in particular the multiple-choice questions. We like to shake things up a bit here without warning anyone, and have the utmost concerns for our students’ health. Really, it’s just about self-direction.”

Ex-Sydney Grammar boys were found to be particularly cheerful. An old Sydney Girl’s student was seen attempting to participate in the inside jokes stating, “Caecilius est in horto”. She was duly informed that was in fact Latin.

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